Funny Ashtrays That Stay Funny After the First Week

Most funny ashtrays are funny once. A slogan printed on a steel dish, a novelty shape in thin plastic, and by the second week it is just a slightly embarrassing object you stub cigarettes into. A good funny ashtray is different. The joke is in the design, not stuck on top of it, so it keeps working. Here are the ones in our collection that we think get it right.

Funny ashtrays with the joke built in

Sex

Sex is a bone-coloured ceramic heart, hand-lettered with a single question: "cigarettes after what?". It is cheeky without being crude, and it tends to start a conversation. Because it is lettered by hand, every one is slightly different.

Puff

Puff is chalk-white ceramic lettered "puff puff pass" in painted script, with four blackened rests. It is a little in-joke for anyone who has ever shared one on a terrace at 2 a.m. Four rests means it is built for a group, which is the point.

Egg

Egg is a fried egg, sunny side up, with a domed gold yolk. Putting ash on breakfast should not be this satisfying. Pair it with Sex and you get Breakfast, which is either a gentle joke or a very specific one, depending on how your mind works.

Pool

Pool is a backyard swimming pool with painted tiles, a duck and a lifebuoy. You rest your cigarette on the edge, like you would rest your arms. It is the least cynical piece we make, which is its own sort of joke.

Chomp, Jaw, Maw and Growl

The bulldogs. Each one has its mouth wide open and the ash goes in. Chomp is tan and crouched low, Jaw is slate blue with a splayed stance, Maw is black and braced, and Growl is espresso brown and mid-bark. A dog that eats your ash is funny the first time and still faintly absurd the hundredth.

Stomp and Slip

Stomp is a clog cast in black-glazed ceramic, with the ash going in the heel. Slip is its white porcelain twin, perforated upper and all. Tapping ash into a shoe is a joke that does not need explaining.

Pinch

Pinch is a coral crab, claws up, with a domed lid. Open it and the crab looks mildly annoyed. Close it and the evidence is gone.

The playing cards

The quietest joke in the collection. Club, Spade, Ace and Diamond are glazed ceramic cards with the suit raised proud. On their own, they are just graphic. Leave one on the table at a card night and the joke writes itself, especially if someone is losing.

Funny, not crude

There is a line between a funny ashtray and an embarrassing one, and it is mostly about restraint. A crude slogan gets one laugh and then makes you wince every time your parents visit. A sly question, a fried egg, a dog with an appetite, those can sit on the coffee table in front of anyone. We aim for the second kind: things that make a friend smile and a stranger curious, without making anyone uncomfortable.

It also helps that the joke is not the only thing going on. Puff and Sex are hand-lettered, so the craft is part of the appeal. The bulldogs are properly sculpted. Even without the punchline, each of these would be a decent object.

What makes a funny ashtray last

• The joke is the form. A dog eating ash, a shoe full of it. You cannot peel the humour off.
• It is still a good object. Glazed ceramic with weight and a proper well. If it worked badly, the joke would sour fast.
• It is dry, not loud. One line of lettering is funnier than a paragraph.
• It suits the moment. Smoking is social. The best funny ashtrays give people something to talk about.

As a gift

A funny ashtray is one of the easier gifts for smokers to get right, because it tells the person you get their sense of humour without making a statement about the habit. For more ideas, see our gifts for smokers guide.

Every piece is ₹1,500, or ₹1,250 each for two and ₹1,000 each for three or more. Flat ₹250 shipping anywhere in India, cash on delivery available. Find the hand-painted ones in the Hand crafted collection, or see everything and pick the joke that suits you.